I’ve always been very driven, and my belief was that we have ‘no time to waste’ here on earth. Everything needs to be well-planned and executed according to my timeline. Let’s go, fast, chop chop, quick.

When things often don't go as planned, I’ve found myself questioning if God loves me.

‘If He loves me, wouldn’t He want me to be happy?’
‘That’s such a great plan, why isn’t God going to bless me?’

‘Isn’t that a great purpose/plan?’

Growing up in the Christian faith, I wouldn’t say I’m unfamiliar with the term,  ‘Promises of God’. We sing about it, hear it being preached, and even pray about it countless times. To me, the promises of God felt like an ideal destination - like, once I’m in that promise, I would have reached my highest point of success. But in recent times, I find myself asking these questions a lot:

1. “Does God really have a promise for me?”
2. “What exactly is this supposed promise I have to hold on to?”
3. “Will I ever live in the great plan God has for me?”

When the prayers you’ve been earnestly and desperately praying for a long time get just a, “Wait”, or worse, complete silence, it’s really hard to let the importance of this term settle into your heart.